wind songs

I wrote this a few years ago, while I was babysitting after putting the kids to bed. I had this book called something like "10,000 Things to be Happy About," and something about the randomness of some things on the list struck me.

the wildest colors, looking irresistible in the afternoon
that is filled with nothing but me,
and wind songs of innocence evaporating away,
dreams slipping with the fading music.
puppy love that stops meaning things
after you realize that you've stopped meaning things
and that when you stop feeling things
it'll be time to let go of the teddy bear on your bed-
it's dirty and foreign to the rest.
but you're growing up too fast
and i still turn to the razor when i need a friend.
i go there before i go to you.
you've probably seen my wrist and been jealous.
but i'm disappointing my angel
and my intensity is getting the best of me.
i think its more of a curse.
my streams of consciousness are sometimes
interrupted by your conscience-
i hate when you do that to me.
and next on my agenda is learning the art of saying no,
and realizing that i can't know you anymore.